Dear Enid: I Struggle to Go On

Dear Enid,

I lost my beloved dog months ago. It’s hard to explain to anyone that didn’t know us together, but she was my everything—she was my every thought, my every breath, my every smile. I feel like my entire world is gone. I know that sounds pretty dramatic and ridiculous, but without her it has felt like a struggle to exist. I’ve tried to do everything right to grieve properly. I’ve read so many books. None of it has helped. I am trying so hard to focus on all the good times we had, but my heart aches unbearably. Everything I did was to see her happy and that made me happy. I have continued to live each day reminding myself to breathe, and I await that moment when my heart aches just even a little bit less.

I came across your resources on dovelewis.org and instantly broke down. I want to do something to feel better, but I just don’t know that I can. If I can barely read through the resources without breaking down, would I ever survive a group session?

Thank you,
Erin

Dear Erin,

What a beautiful photo, it radiates the loving bond you shared with your beautiful girl, I am so very sorry for your loss. {Picture right is for illustrative purposes only.} You are experiencing a deep grief, which makes sense considering the strength and importance of the relationship you shared. 

Grief is the normal response to a significant loss. Knowing that grief is normal however, does not minimize its difficulty. Grief is frequently misunderstood and misconceptions persist. Click here for a description of the stages of grief.

I refer to grief as the labor of mourning. It requires more energy to work through and takes longer than most people expect. It takes a toll on us physically and emotionally.

You speak of your broken heart and the desire to heal—I promise you, you are already on the right road to reach that goal, and I believe the pet loss support group can help you reach it. Being surrounded by others who understand on a heartfelt level is comforting. Sharing your story aloud with others who understand is healing, even when done through tears. Hearing other people’s stories helps you to feel less isolated and hopeful that you too will heal. 

I invite you to come to as many of our free pet loss support groups as you would like. Talk/share as much or as little as you feel like at the moment. Bring photos to show off. We provide the tissues, compassion and tools to cope during this challenging and amazing journey called grief.

When you are unable to make it to group, here is a list of some wonderful support resources available on the internet.

www.aplb.org
www.petloss.com
www.griefnet.org
www.pet-loss.net

Warmly,
Enid